Irkens, the new Doofenshmirtz
by Kotawings
Summary: Remember when the Doofinator called an alien armada with a guitar solo?  Well, he tried it again, and the Irkens answered his call!  Short story.  Rated T for fighting and mild language. Possible ZAGR.
1. Quick Review

Quick Refresher: Before you read, I hope that you've watched both Phineas and Ferb AND Invader Zim. If not, WHY ARE YOU HERE?

Now that that's settled, I will ask you to rack your brain to remember a specific episode of P&F. Hopefully, you'll remember the episode where Doofenshmirtz tries to summon an alien armada to him by playing a guitar solo. If you don't remember that episode, it isn't a big deal, but having seen it will help you be a little less confused during the story.

The plot of this story doesn't have a really specific time setting, it just takes place sometime after that episode. Well, enough of my chatter, ON TO THE STORY!


	2. The Myth

Zim's POV

I remember the day when I heard the alien invasion signal for the first time.

You see, the signal had been discovered thousands of Earth years ago by the people now called the Ancient Egyptians. One day, while playing their musical instruments, they produced a supersonic wave that reached into the depths of space and hypnotized several different species of life.

One of these species was the Irkens.

While in a trance, the Irken armada (which was nowhere as superior as it is now) headed mindlessly toward the source of the sound. The Egyptians, seeing this as some sort of miracle, commanded the armada to build giant structures that later became known as the pyramids. After the pyramids were built, they ceased their music. The armada, now free of the trance, flew back to Irk in a daze. They barely remembered what had happened, and only knew the general location of the planet they had been to. Therefore, they drew the planet on a sticky note and posted it to the giant map of the known universe on Conventia.

As years passed and the Irkens who had been under the trance passed away, the story began to get questioned. Eventually, the story became a myth and a question mark was drawn on top of the sticky note planet. The planet was then all but forgotten.

Soon enough, only the historians and top ranked Irkens even knew the myth. And those who knew it didn't believe it in the least.

So when the Tallest pointed out the sticky note planet, I didn't question them, as I had never heard the myth.

But during the six month travel to Earth, I became bored and began to sift through various data bases. I then stumbled across the myth of "The Alien Invasion Signal." After reading it, I only grew more excited. I believed that the Tallest had sent me to investigate the existence of the planet in the myth. Little did I know, I would experience the signal myself.

"Look, GIR! The pyramids! Can you believe that we're looking at proof that the Alien Invasion Signal actually exists?"

I looked over at GIR, who was staring at me blankly.

"Do you even know what I'm talking about?"

"I really don't!"

I sighed. I wasn't even going to bother explaining. Instead, I took out a camera and took a picture. Now I could show it to the Tallests and prove that the myth is true!

"Come, GIR! We must go home now and show this picture to the Tallests!"

"Okie Dokie!"

We hopped into the Voot Runner and headed for home.

3rd Person POV

_P&F Tri-State Area_

It's a normal morning. Phineas and Ferb are sitting under the tree in their backyard discussing ideas for what to do. Perry heads for one of the various entrances to his secret base.

Over at Doofenshmirtz's building, Doofenshmirtz can be seen fiddling around with his guitar.

"What are you doing, sir?" Norm asked.

"I am going to try and summon the alien armada again, Norm. It almost worked last time! Plus, this time I am one step ahead of Perry the Platypus! You see, I set my alarm this morning ten minutes earlier than usual! Now I will finally be able to take over the entire Tri-State area!"

Doofenshmirtz began to play the Ancient Egyptian guitar solo he found while he was in Egypt. Sound waves began to cut through the air and into space.

_Following the sound waves…_

The sound waves begin to reach Irk. In the streets, Irkens stop whatever they're doing, their eyes blank.

The armada and _The Massive_ begin to head toward Earth.

"It's working, Norm! You can see the ships coming!"

*Da Dun!*

Perry enters in the usual way by jumping into the scene.

But amazingly enough, Doofenshmirtz doesn't even look at Perry, instead, he tells Norm to capture Perry for him.

Perry, caught off guard is easily captured.

"Yes! Yes!"

The Irken Armada comes to a halt in front of Doofenshmirtz, waiting for his commands.

"Hello aliens! I now command you to take over the entire Tri-State area!"

Inside _The Massive_, the Tallest give the command to begin attacking the city.

Lasers rain down all across the city, screams begin to tear through the air.

The city is being destroyed.

"Hey, wait! Don't destroy everything and kill everyone! Just convince them to do my bidding!"

But by now, Doofenshmirtz had stopped playing his guitar and the Armada was no longer under the trance.

"Hey, where are we?" Tallest Purple asked.

"I don't know, but it looks like we're destroying something! Let's keep doing it!" Tallest Red exclaimed.

"Sounds good to me! Hey, someone make some popcorn! I'm hungry!"

Zim's POV

We had just landed when a strange sensation overcame me.

Soon enough, I felt myself being drawn in a different direction, toward the source of the strange sound I was hearing. I couldn't control my own body!

_Eh? What is this? What's going on?_

"Master? Where are you going?"

_Help GIR! I can't control myself!_

"Master? Master!"

I could only hope that GIR would follow me. But with my luck, GIR would lose interest and go watch TV instead.

Just as I began to think that I'd never gain control of my body again, the strange sensation stopped.

I also stopped moving.

"Yes, I have regained control! Victory is mine!"

I looked back behind me to see if GIR was still there. Not to my surprise, he wasn't.

But that didn't matter now, what mattered is figuring out what had just happened, and how to make sure it didn't happen again.


	3. Seeing the Destruction

3rd Person POV

Phineas looked up from the giant robot he was building. He thought he'd heard someone screaming.

"Hey, Ferb, did you hear that?" he asked.

Ferb nodded.

"Do you think someone's in trouble?"

Ferb shrugged.

Phineas didn't hear anything else, so he went back to work. Just then, Isabella ran into their yard.

"Phineas! There's something wrong! People are running around and panicking about something!"

Phineas dropped the wrench he was using. "Do you know what?" he asked.

Ferb cleared his throat. "Well, it might have something to do with the space ships flying around and shooting lasers everywhere." He pointed toward the sky.

Isabella and Phineas looked up at the sky in awe and terror.

Almost directly overhead of them was _The Massive._ Tallests Red and Purple were thoroughly enjoying themselves watching the destruction of the helpless city.

"You know, I do wonder what planet this is. We could contact the invader," Red said thoughtfully.

"I agree," Purple said. "Pilots, identify this planet."

"Identifying… Sirs, the planet we are currently on is known as Earth."

Red spit out his drink in shock. "Bu… But, this is where Zim is! How on Irk did we ever get here?"

"Well, we wouldn't have come here on our own… do how _did_ we get here? Now that I think about it, I don't remember a thing about the past half hour!" Purple was truly puzzled. Zim couldn't have done this, he wasn't **that** smart…

That's when Red remembered something. "Hey, didn't we assign Zim to the sticky note planet?"

"I think so, why?"

"You idiot, don't you remember the Myth?"

Purple's eyes dilated. "You don't think…"

"What other explanation is there?" Red asked, sitting down.

"Do you think we should call Zim?" Purple asked, genuinely thinking that Zim could be a help in the matter.

"I don't see why not. He may know what just happened."

"Alright then, pilot, contact Zim."

Moments later, Zim appeared on screen, looking quite shaken up. He saluted. "Yes, my Tallests?"

"Zim, we have a question for you. You see, one moment we were flying through space towards Meekrob, and the next, we were here on Earth without remembering any of it. None of us knows what happened! Do you know anything about this?" Red asked earnestly.

Zim paled. "Well, my Tallests, just moments ago, I completely lost control of my body and started walking towards a specific place. I have regained control now, but I had no idea what was going on."

"Zim, do you know of any, uh, large structures on this planet that people believe may not have been built by life native to this planet?" Red asked, hoping that Zim would prove his theory wrong.

"As a matter of fact, I do," Zim said, pulling out a camera. "I took this photo just mere Earth hours ago, and I think you should have a look." Zim pulled a picture up on the tiny screen and held it up for the Tallests to see.

"You see, my Tallests, these are what the humans call, The Pyramids. The structures reside in a place called Egypt. I went to see them, and I don't see how these pathetic humans could have ever created them themselves."

"Zim, have you ever heard of the myth that talks about the 'Alien Invasion Signal?"

"I have indeed my Tallests, that is why I went to investigate."

Red sat down with a groan. "I'm beginning to think the myth is true… I think that this horrible planet needs to be destroyed immediately, to prevent this from happening again. What do you two think?"

"I agree with you, I don't like this planet," Purple said, popping a chip into his mouth.

"You are asking for Zim's opinion?" Zim asked excitedly.

"As a matter of fact, we are," Red said, hardly believing himself.

"Well, I think that it is time for the puny Earth to be destroyed as well," Zim said happily. Finally, the Dib human would be gone…

"Great. Well, Zim, we'd better get back to destroying things. Why don't you start destroying the city nearest to you? That'll save us some time," Red said, trying to figure out how to get Zim to leave them alone again.

"Of course my Tallests! I will do as you wish!" Zim saluted and the transmission was cut.

"Well, I guess we'd better keep destroying things then," Red said.

Down below, Doofenshmirtz was officially freaking out.

"Perry the Platypus! What do we do? The aliens are destroying everything, not just helping me take over!"

Perry was watching the ships overhead, trying to figure out what to do. This was much too big a job for him, he'd need back up.

Perry's watch beeped.

"Agent P, what's going on?" Major Monogram asked.

Perry pointed to the sky.

"Are those aliens?"

Perry nodded.

"Gadzooks! Come on, Carl! We need to alert all the agents to come and help! Otherwise, we're all doomed!"

Off-screen, Carl could be heard screaming in a very un-manly way.

"Agent P, backup will be there as soon as possible."

Perry nodded and cut the transmission.

"Is help coming?" Doofenshmirtz asked hopefully.

Perry glared at him.

_Zim's city_

Zim's laugh rang through the air as if through a loud speaker.

Dib groaned. "What is he up to now?" he wondered aloud.

"Shut up, Dib!" Gaz called from down the hall.

The doorbell rang.

Dib ran downstairs to open the door.

Zim stood there, a superior expression on his face.

"Zim? What are you doing here?" Dib asked, bewildered.

"Why don't you turn on your television to your pitiful human news?" Zim asked, a sneer plastered on his face.

Something told Dib to do as he was told, even though it was his enemy who suggested it.

He walked over to the TV and switched it to the news station. The image that met his eyes was terrifying. Irken ships were flying over a town leaving trails of destruction and ruin everywhere they went. People could be heard screaming. He glanced at the corner of the screen and saw to his horror that the footage was being live broadcast.

He spun around and charged at Zim. Zim had been laughing like a maniac and was caught off guard as Dib tackled him.

"Oof!"

"What city are they attacking?" Dib asked, trying to punch Zim's face.

Zim dodged. "Why should I care? As long as there's destruction happening, it doesn't matter where!" Zim cackled as Dib took another swing and missed.

The news caster then began to speak. "These mysterious ships appeared over Danville just a mere fifteen minutes ago, but already major damage has been caused and we may just lose the city…"

"Danville? That's only a twenty minute drive from here!"

Dib leapt up, rushing for the door.

"And just how do you think you're going to get there, Dib-monkey?" Zim asked.

Dib glared at Zim. "Have you forgotten about Tak's ship?" he asked, racing to his backyard.

"Ah! Get back here! You've no right to use Irken technology!" Zim yelled as he raced after him.

But Zim was too late to catch Dib. Dib was already jumping into Tak's former ship and was starting it up.

By the time Zim had reached the ship, Dib was already too high to reach.

"Haha! See you Zim! I'm going to help save the Earth!" Dib shouted as he took off.

Zim kicked the ground in frustration. "Oh, that stupid human!"

Just then, Gaz walked outside. "Yeah, Dib is stupid. Now leave, your voice is making me sick."

"You have no control over Zim, Dib-sister," Zim said, crossing his arms over his chest.

Gaz glared at Zim, then rolled her eyes. "Fine, stay if you want, just shut up or I'll spray you with soda." With that, she walked back inside, playing her Game Slave the entire time.

Zim, who didn't really want to stay anyway, left just a moment after.

Gaz had been watching out the window. When she saw Zim leave, she snickered. "I win," she said quietly to herself, then turned to the TV to watch the ongoing destruction.

Meanwhile, Zim was racing back to his base to get his Voot Cruiser and head off for Danville as well.

He burst into his base. "Computer!"

"Whaaaaat?" the computer asked grumpily.

"Ready the Voot Cruiser!"

The computer sighed but did what it was told.

GIR walked into the room. "Where ya goin'?" he asked.

"I'm going to help the Tallests destroy some pitiful Earth city. You are to stay here and watch the base."

"Awww, why can't I come?" GIR asked sadly.

"Because you'd find some way to ruin things!" Zim said angrily.

"But I like destroying…"

"I know you do GIR, but I need you to watch the base for me, ok?"

GIR perked up at once. "Okie Dokie!"

Zim was just about to head to the launch bay when the doorbell rang.

"Eh? Who could that be?" he asked, putting his disguise on. Zim opened the door to find Gaz waiting impatiently.

"Gaz human! What are you doing at Zim's base? BE GONE WITH YOU!"

"I wanted to come with you so I could see the destruction up close," Gaz said, pretending like Zim hadn't said a thing.

"You, come with Zim? NEVER!"

"If you want to live to see tomorrow, you'll take me with you!" Gaz threatened.

Zim gulped. It was at times like this when he was actually afraid of Dib's creepy sister. He considered. It wasn't as if Gaz was going to help anyone, she just wanted to sit back and watch the show. There wasn't really anything wrong with her coming…

"Fine, you may come with Zim. But you must not bother me."

Gaz snorted. "Yeah, whatever." She walked into the base.

"Now, Dib-sister, come with Zim to the Voot Cruiser and we will be on our way."

"Don't call me that," Gaz said angrily.

"Well, then what would you prefer to be called?" Zim asked, rolling his eyes. _ Stupid humans_.

"If you have to call me anything, then call me Gaz. But if you can avoid talking to me altogether, that's perfectly fine with me."

"Fine, _Gaz_," Zim said.

Zim and Gaz got into the Voot and began to head to Danville. They ignored each other the entire way.

As they reached the outskirts of Danville, Zim landed the ship and told Gaz to get out.

"You are no longer my responsibility, so go and do whatever it is creepy Earth females do," Zim said, shooing her.

"Who's going to bring me back?" Gaz asked.

"You can walk," Zim said with a sneer.

"If you don't come and bring me back home, Zim, I will hunt you down and make you wish that you were being chased by thousands of rabid dogs in a thunder storm rather than ever having messed with me."

Zim blinked, unsure of what to do. He sighed. "Fine, but you must stay here. If you don't I will not waste my time on looking for you. Do you understand?"

Gaz nodded.

Zim then jumped back into his ship and flew away.

Gaz sat down in the grass and watched the smoke billow up from the city.

_This is so cool!_

But before too long, she began to get bored. She was too far away to see anything properly. "Maybe I'll just get a little bit closer. Besides, I'll have plenty of time to get back here."

So Gaz stood up and began to make her way towards Danville.


	4. Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorparated!

A/N: Hiya guys! First off, I'll do my best so put some ZAGR in here, but I'm not very good at romance stuff, so we'll see what happens. Second, if you have any ideas for the story, let me know! If I like your idea, I might just add it in there. ^^ Now, on to the story!

!#$%^&*()_+

3rd Person POV

Zim looked down to see Gaz leaving where he had dropped her off.

Of course, he had expected that, which was why he had placed a tracker on her. Now Gaz would have no reason to beat him up.

So off he went, flying towards the destruction and mayhem.

Gaz was also headed towards the mayhem, but at a much slower rate.

_I wish Zim could have dropped me off closer, why should he care how close I am?_

Before too long, Gaz reached several small houses. These had yet to be touched by the armada but all of the people who lived in them were either hiding or had evacuated.

Well, all but one.

Gaz peeked into a fenced in backyard. And there, standing in the middle of the yard, were several kids. They looked terrified.

"Wimps."

The kids looked over at her.

_Did I say that aloud?_

Gaz now had unwanted attention caused by none other than herself.

_Ugh…_

Gaz began to leave when…

"Aren't you scared too?"

"Wha?"

"I asked if you were scared. It's not every day that aliens decide to attack our town you know."

Gaz stared at the red head who had spoken. Why the hell would he care whether or not she was scared?

"Why do you care?" she asked.

"Well, any person in their right mind would be scared, and if you're not scared then you must be crazy."

"So what if I am?"

"Phineas, just ignore her, she's a _girl_. A crazy girl."

Gaz glared at the guy who had insulted her. He looked like your typical bully, which, in Gaz's opinion, was nothing special. Beating up bullies was her specialty.

"You wanna say that to my face?" she demanded.

"Yeah, maybe I will!" He turned to her. "You're just a crazy girl!"

THAT. WAS. IT.

Gaz leaped over the fence, landing perfectly. "Take it back, or **ELSE,**" she said, pointing at him.

"Uh… Buford, you might want to consider…"

"Shut up, nerd!" Buford yelled. He turned back to Gaz. "I'll say it again, you're a crazy girl." He crossed his arms over his chest.

Gaz sneered. "Fine, but you asked for it." She shot forward, almost a blur. Before he knew what was happening, Buford was on the ground, trying to regain his lost breath.

But Gaz wasn't finished yet. She picked Buford up by the front of his shirt and threw him against a tree, sending bark and leaves flying. She then walked over and stood over him, glaring menacingly.

"Feel like apologizing now?" she asked, threat evident in her voice.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Buford gasped. "Just don't hurt me!"

Gaz smirked in triumph. Her work here was done. She turned to find all eyes on her. She glared at all of them.

"Anyone else have a problem?" she asked.

Everyone shook their heads.

"Good."

Gaz headed for the gate. She opened it and took one glance back. Satisfied with her work, she slammed the gate and headed for the city center.

"Wow, Buford, I didn't think anyone could have beaten you up," Phineas said, slightly amazed.

Buford got to his feet shakily. "I may have said I was sorry, but I was right about one thing. That was one crazy chick."

!#$%^&*()_+8D

*Duh Dun!*

Several dozen animal agents landed in various poses next to Perry, ready for action.

"Wow, that's a lot of agents!" Doofenshmirtz said nervously.

Perry ignored him.

The animal agents began to talk amongst themselves, trying to formulate a plan. But since I don't understand animals (no matter how much I'd like to) I am unable to inform you readers as to what exactly was said. (Too bad we didn't have Phineas' and Ferb's animal translator, huh?)

_Meanwhile…_

Zim flew low over the smoldering city looking for Dib.

_Where could the little Earth monkey have gone?_

ZIm took a glance down at the buildings. He did a double take as he flew over *DOOFENSHMIRTZ EVIL INCORPARATED! 8D*

"What the… Are those all animals in little hats?"

Zim, looking confused, shrugged and continued to look for Dib.

Little did he know that Dib was following him.

"Heh heh, Zim won't think to look for me behind him!" Dib said, congratulating himself on his brilliance. "Although, following Zim around the whole time isn't a very constructive use of my time here…"

"Eh?"

Dib clapped a hand over his mouth, realizing that the radio was switched on and that Zim could hear his every word.

Zim spun his ship around to find Dib in Tak's ship just hovering there.

"Stupid, crazy big-headed boy!" Zim yelled as he flew toward Dib.

"Ah!" Dib yelled, turning Tak's ship around as fast as he possibly could.

Zim, cackling evilly, gave chase.

Below, Doofenshmirtz looked up curiously. "Well, would you look at that. The spaceships are chasing each other!"

All the agents rolled their eyes.

Just then, _The Massive_ began to fly right overhead.

Perry had an idea.

!#$%^&*()_+xD

Gaz wandered around the city, casually looking at the half-destroyed buildings and screaming people. She grinned. Chaos was so much fun!

She looked up as Zim and Dib flew around erratically overhead, not sure who was chasing who.

_Boys…_

She continued walking, becoming more and more frustrated because the boys seemed to be following her. It was only a coincidence, but it did nothing to help Gaz's fiery temper.

There was a creaking sound.

Gaz turned to see a building start to fall.

_Awesome!_

Well, it was awesome until it began to fall toward her.

!#$^*+_)(*&^%:3

A/N: DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN! Sorry if the chapters are a little confusing… I'm trying to show the story from everyone's viewpoints… And yes, it was necessary for me to add in the Doof's building theme song. Just imagine that…

_Spaceships are flying around overhead, lasers being fired everywhere you look. The camera pans over a large building. Suddenly, an unfitting tune starts…_

_*DOOFENSHMIRTZ EVIL INCORPARATED!*_

:D


	5. Agents Kick Some Irken Butt

3rd Person

Dib watched in horror as the collapsing building careened toward his little sister.

"Gaz!"

Just as all hope seemed lost, Zim flew his Voot right past Gaz, popped the windshield off, grabbed her and pulled her out of harm's way. Quite an impressive display.

Dib watched slack jawed as his enemy rescued his little sister from certain death. _Why would he do a thing like that? He doesn't care about her…_

~!#$%^&*()_+

Zim quickly landed his ship and set Gaz gently on the ground.

"You need to be more careful about where you're standing, little Gaz," Zim scolded.

Gaz crossed her arms ove her chest. "I would have been fine. Now leave and go back to chasing my stupid brother or whatever it was that you were doing before deciding to play hero."

"Eh? Play hero? ZIM JUST RESCUED YOU! DOES HE NOT GET THANKS?"

"No."

Zim scowled at her but made no further comment. He pressed the button to replace his windshield and took off into the sky.

Gaz watched him leave. Even though she'd never admit it, she _was_ thankful. If it wasn't for Zim, she would've been squashed flat. But she'd never give Zim the satisfaction of hearing that from her.

~!#$%^&*()_+

*DUN DUN!*

The secret agents were slowly but surely creating an animal tower by standing on each other's shoulders, working their way up to _The Massive_ as it hovered just above the building.

(cue secret agent theme song)

Finally, all the agents save Perry were stacked up, almost reaching the giant ship.

"Are you going up into the spaceship?" Doofenshmirtz asked.

Perry nodded.

"Can I come with you?"

Perry gave Doofenshmirtz a look that clearly stated that Doofenshmirtz was crazy to even ask such a thing.

Without another word from Doofenshmirtz, Perry launched himself up the tower of agents. As he reached the top, Perry boarded the spaceship and began to help the other animals up one by one. Before much longer, they were all aboard and ready to chase the Irkens away from Earth.

~!#$%^&*()_+

"Filthy Dib-sister, how could she not be thankful that Zim rescued her?" Zim asked himself. "How ungrateful… Eh?"

Several small objects were quickly approaching his ship. It was, in fact, several of the secret agents in their own ships.

Agent C, a tabby cat, meowed out orders to the other four agents helping him attack the alien ships. One by one they broke away from their formation and went after their own individual targets. Agent C continued to head for Zim.

"What is this?" Zim yelled. "A simple house cat would dare attack ZIM?"

When Agent C got close enough, he threw himself on the windshield of Zim's Voot Cruiser, attacking it viciously. Zim laughed at the ridiculous display.

"You think you can break through into an Irken Voot Cruiser? Think again, pitiful cat!"

Zim pressed a button and the entire windshield came off, flying toward the ground. Agent C was carried with it.

"Too easy!" Zim said with a sneer.

Just then, Dib flew right in front of Zim, cutting him off and almost causing a collision.

"Insolent fool boy!" Zim cried. "Do not mess with ZIM!"

"I'll do whatever I want, Zim! And now, if I may ask a question…"

"You dare question me?"

"Yes, I do! Why did you rescue Gaz? Huh? I didn't think you cared about anyone but yourself!"

Zim was taken aback. But an answer came to him soon enough.

"Simple. Your sister threatened me with unimaginable pain."

"Yeah, but if she died, you wouldn't have had to worry about that, now would you?"

Zim was silent. Why _had_ he rescued Gaz?

~!#$%^&*()_+

*Dooby Dooby Doo Bah, Dooby Dooby Doo Bah*

The agents snuck inside _The Massive _as a group, being careful to avoid being seen by any Irkens. Finally, they reached the bridge where the Tallest were eating snacks and happily watching the destruction.

"This is fun!" Purple said happily, eating a handful of chips.

*Duh Dun!*

The agents leapt into the room, posing for effect.

The Tallest looked at them, confused.

"How did these animals with tiny hats get in here?" Red asked.

The pilots shrugged.

"Oh well. Guards!"

Several of the guards came forward.

"Get these pests out of here, they're annoying us."

The guards continued toward the agents, ready to shoo them away.

That's when Perry gave the signal to attack.

Agents tore through the room at impossible speeds. They attacked the pilots, the guards and even the Tallest themselves.

"Ah! Make them stop! Make them stop!" Purple screeched.

The Tallest were running around, arms waving wildly.

~!#$%^&*()_\

Gaz looked up into the sky. Just moments ago, the giant ship floating high above had been flying steady and straight. Now, the ship was flying erratically.

"Huh," Gaz said to herself. "Wonder what's going on up there."

She shrugged and continued to make her way through the smoldering city. Anytime she saw anything that looked interesting, she'd pick it up, examine it, and toss it elsewhere when it turned out to be just some random piece of junk.

Eventually, Gaz began to get bored.

"This is stupid," she said to no one in particular. "There's not enough fire and death."

Gaz sat down on the sidewalk. She picked up a stick and began to draw in the layer of ash the coated the ground.

~!#$%^&*()_

The agents had all the Irkens in the bridge cornered.

"Just tell us what you want from us!" Tallest Purple whimpered. "We'll do anything if you'll just leave us alone!"

Unfortunately, the agents had no way to communicate with the Irkens.

"Sirs, I don't know if they can speak the same language we speak," a pilot said.

"Well, then bring them a piece of paper or something they can write on!" Red said.

The agents allowed one of the pilots to fetch a piece of paper.

The pilot came back only a few moments later with a piece of paper and a pencil in hand. He handed both the objects to Perry.

Perry quickly wrote out that he wanted the aliens to leave Earth and never come back. He handed the note to the Tallest.

"Fine, we'll leave! Just let us go!" Purple said.

Perry nodded and motioned for the agents to back off.

The Tallest quickly commanded the pilots to call off the attack and to order the rest of the armada back into space.

The agents, seeing a job well done, leapt out a window and opened their parachutes to float safely to the ground.

~!#$%^&*()_+

A/N: Yes, this story is almost over. Writing this thing has been a little awkward for me because… well, I honestly don't know. I just feel like I don't have enough ideas for this story to progress very well.

Note: No animals were harmed in the writing of this chapter.


	6. The Pyro and the Psycho

3rd Person

Zim, who was still confused about his feelings toward Gaz, suddenly noticed _The Massive _swerving around and no longer attacking.

"Eh?" he asked, watching intently.

A few moments later, _The Massive_ had stopped moving entirely. Zim watched, holding his breath.

Dib had also noticed this strange turn of events. "What's going on up there?" he asked to himself. That's when he noticed that Zim had stopped paying attention to anything other than _The Massive._ Dib grinned evilly. He had an idea.

!#$$%^&*

Gaz had found a lighter on the street. It still had plenty of lighter fluid, and she intended to use it. She took the lighter over to an unburned part of the block and proceeded to find a good spot for starting a fire. She was just about to flick the lighter switch when the sound of a crashing ship sounded from above.

Frustrated at being interrupted in her arson, Gaz glared at the sky to see who had caused the disruption.

You see, Dib had taken advantage of Zim's distraction and had attacked him. Zim's Voot Cruiser was now on fire and was rapidly losing altitude.

"AHH! AHH! AHH!" Zim cried, desperately trying to regain control. "I'LL GET YOU DIB! YOU STINKING HUMAN!"

Gaz, who now realized what was going on, smirked. She judged where Zim's ship would crash and tossed the lighter in the general direction. The resulting explosion would destroy what remained of the block.

Not wanting to be exploded herself, Gaz quickly took cover in a nearby alley. Only a few seconds later, a huge explosion could be heard. When the coast was clear, Gaz casually walked out to see what all had happened.

Zim had ejected at the last second and was lying face down on the sidewalk, moaning softly. He wasn't terribly injured, but his pride was badly hurt. Gaz walked over and stared at him.

"You still have to get me back home, you know," she said, sneering.

"Ugh… Why does the Gaz human torture Zim so?" Zim asked no one in particular.

"Because, it's fun," Gaz answered.

Zim flipped over onto his back, looking at the now retreating armada.

"Ah! The Tallest are leaving! But they haven't destroyed the Earth! MY TALLEST! COME BACK!"

Zim did his best to stand up, but Gaz pushed him down.

"Oof! What was that for?" Zim asked angrily, rubbing his behind.

"Why would you run after them? It's a stupid thing to do. It's not like you can catch them or anything," Gaz scoffed.

Zim grimaced at Gaz.

~!#$#%$^&

"Well, that didn't turn out very well," Purple stated.

Everyone agreed.

"What do we tell Zim?" Purple asked Red.

"Uh… I guess we tell him that the threat was eliminated? And to keep up the good work?"

"Won't he wonder why we didn't just take over while we were here?"

"Probably. We can just tell him that we had more important work to do or something," Red said with a shrug.

"Yeah, okay."

!##$%^&

Dib had already began to pilot Tak's ship back to his house. He had completely forgotten that Gaz was back in the city. But truthfully, he probably had no desire to go back for her anyway.

On the other hand, Zim had no choice but to figure out how to get him and Gaz back home.

"Well, genius? Got any bright ideas?" Gaz asked, rolling her eyes.

"Of course! THE ALMIGHTY ZIM always has a backup plan!" Zim said, throwing up his arms for emphasis.

"Oh yeah? Well, what is it then?"

"Uh…"

Gaz smirked.

Zim had no idea. He didn't want to walk home, that would take hours! But he didn't really have another choice.

"Zim and little Gaz will be walking home together," Zim said grumpily. He didn't want to spend any more time with Gaz than he had to. Especially with his feelings so screwed up at the moment.

"Well, I guess we'd better start walking then, huh?" Gaz asked, beginning to head toward home. She didn't have any problem with walking. Just as long as Zim minded his own business.

"I suppose. Let us begin the horrible, foot numbing walk back."

"Pshh, whiner."

!~#$%^&*&

By the time Dib realized that he had left Gaz, Gaz and Zim were already half-way finished with their walk. Dib decided to go and find her, even though he really didn't want to. (What a good big brother :P)

He got back into Tak's ship and took off.

~!#$%^&***)

Several minutes later, Zim and Gaz saw Dib flying toward them.

"Well, look at who decided to come and make sure I was okay," Gaz said, sounding amused.

"Ugh, not Dib again!" Zim yelled. "HE WILL PAY FOR MAKING US WALK!"

Gaz shrugged. "Sure, that actually sounds like fun. We can take turns beating him up."

Zim smiled evily.

They stopped and waited for Dib to land. As soon as Tak's ship had hit the ground, Dib leapt out, trying to tackle Zim.

"What are you doing with my sister?" He yelled.

Zim easily stepped aside and watched Dib tumble to the ground. Gaz then walked forward and proceeded to beat the snot out of Dib.

"Ouch! Ah, AH!"

Gaz tossed Dib back on the ground where Zim picked him up and began slapping him across the face. After he had finished, he too threw Dib onto the ground.

"That, Dib-monkey, was for making Zim and Gaz walk back!" Zim said, dusting his hands off.

"What? Why am I the reason you two had to walk back? AND WHY ARE YOU WALKING TOGETHER?"

Gaz decided to answer. "Zim brought me to the battle in his ship, I made him promise to bring me back as well. Because you destroyed his ship, we had to walk."

Dib's mouth hung open.

"Now, if you'll excuse us, we're stealing your ship," Gaz said, getting in Tak's ship. Zim had already boarded while Gaz had explained their situation.

"Have fun walking, Dib!" Zim cackled.

And with those last words, Zim and Gaz took off toward home.

~!#$%^&*

A/N: Nope, the story isn't over quite yet. Maybe one or two more chapters. I actually like the way this chapter turned out, it feels less awkward than the others. Just a quick question, if I were to write a ZAGR fic, would any of you be interested? After all, ZAGR is my favorite IZ relationship. ^^


	7. Epilogue

3rd Person

Thanks to Phineas and Ferb, it didn't take Danville very long to recover from the alien attack. The block that Gaz had blown up had suffered the most, but it too recovered.

The secret agents were all rewarded for their hard work. They received medals and a giant party was thrown in their honor.

On the other hand, Doofenshmirtz had learned his lesson about messing around with aliens. He shredded his sheet music and smashed his guitar so he wouldn't be tempted to try it again. He also began to think his plans through more. But that didn't last for very long, it took up too much time.

The Irken armada went back to Irk and quickly confirmed that the Myth was true. And when Zim called to ask why the Tallest had suddenly left, they simply told him that the threat was eliminated and there was no need to continue fighting. They cut the transmission before Zim could ask any more questions.

Speaking of Zim, he continued to plan ways to destroy the Earth. He also began to ask Gaz if she'd like to help every so often. Gaz, not wanting to miss out on the violence, helped every chance she had. Dib had his hands full trying to keep the two trouble makers from taking over the world.

~!#$%^&*

A/N: Yeah, that's where the story ends :P To be truthful, I don't like this story very much. Oh well, I hope you enjoyed it.

~Kota


End file.
